Just had a chance to read a very challenging book by the Pastor of Mosiac Church in Los Angeles. Erwin McManus is known for several of his writings, but this is an especially motivating work. The entire study is from I Samuel 14, and focuses on Jonathan, son of Saul.
The Israelite army is pinned down by their adversaries, the Philistines. (Seems like the Hebrew people are historically in someone's crosshairs.) King Saul was not taking action against the enemy, and his son Jonathan had a moment of inspiration, which he shared with his armor-bearer: "Come, let's go over to the outpost of those uncircumcised fellows. Perhaps the Lord will act in our behalf. None can hinder the Lord from saving, whether by many, or by few." His armor-bearer replied,"Do all that you have in mind. Go ahead; I am with you heart and soul".
McManus points out the Choices available to Jonathan, the Initiative God's work requires, and the Uncertainty involved in adventuring with the Lord. Jonathan's life had an Influence on his companion, which helped both of them take a Risk for God.... something that is always present, if we are going to Advance the kingdom. When we make an Impact for the Lord's work, often a Movement occurs that can lead to the Awakening of God's people. (Okay, I gave you the chapter headings, capitalized!)
Again and again, the author points out the importance of responding in the moment of invitation to be partners with the Lord. One of my favorite quotes in the book reveals the impact we should be having on others: "What you may never see is the number of people who are pulled into God's purpose for their lives through the wind shear of your obedience". Simply, when we follow the Lord, others are challenged and emboldened to answer their individual call, as well.
Currently in our young singles/college group, there are at least 4 young ladies, and 8 young men who are either in studies, training, or have already answered God's call to full-time service. It wasn't necessarily one "going to the altar" and others following.... it was more like what Eugene Petersen refers to as a "long obedience in the same direction" for each of them. They each kept going forward, stepping into ministry opportunities, that led them to their present moving status.
Back to Jonathan, it's possible to read but not see the Risk and Uncertainty evident in these few verses: "Come, let's go.... perhaps the Lord will act..." How's that for an action plan for a church or ministry committee? I want to start trying more often to see opportunities where the Lord may just be waiting for someone to step up, and step into a greater part of His work!
Monday, October 12, 2009
Monday, September 21, 2009
God's Power Flowing
While reading Psalm 29 in The Message version, I saw some very interesting concepts and promises in this praise Psalm. (I was reading this during one of the downpours of rain that had put over 3 inches of water in our rain gauge!) Toward the end, the psalmist speaks of God's throne being above the floodwaters...above and beyond the problems and difficulties of this world.
But what was stunning to me was how it continued: "Above the floodwaters is God's throne from which His power flows..." His power is FLOWING from his throne, it is not static. Now WHERE would His power be GOING, in it's FLOWING? It surely is going in every direction, and it's on the move!
The next phrase refers again to His throne "from which He rules the world". Then is the answer to my question: " God makes His people strong, God gives His people peace". We are the recipients of the flow... not just from the one-time event of the Cross, but from God's throne itself!
Think of the solar winds from our sun, and the different types of rays it gives off. Our sun is so amazingly powerful, that it operates the nature system on the entire planet. And like when God told Moses in Exodus, "You can't see my face and live", we cannot physically tolerate, in these bodies, everything our sun gives off. It is just too powerful, too potent. That's why we have sunscreen! And our atmosphere is always under discussion by environmentalists, lest we destroy it's protective nature. God lets the good stuff through from the sun, and protects us from that which is too powerful for us, in this life.
BUT, one day, we will get to bask in the fullness of the power generating and emanating from the SON!!! Until then, I'm going to be believing that the power from God's throne is on it's way to those of us who believe. It has no other purpose, or destination!!! It is powerful, and it is fine-tuned for just what we need for every moment!!
But what was stunning to me was how it continued: "Above the floodwaters is God's throne from which His power flows..." His power is FLOWING from his throne, it is not static. Now WHERE would His power be GOING, in it's FLOWING? It surely is going in every direction, and it's on the move!
The next phrase refers again to His throne "from which He rules the world". Then is the answer to my question: " God makes His people strong, God gives His people peace". We are the recipients of the flow... not just from the one-time event of the Cross, but from God's throne itself!
Think of the solar winds from our sun, and the different types of rays it gives off. Our sun is so amazingly powerful, that it operates the nature system on the entire planet. And like when God told Moses in Exodus, "You can't see my face and live", we cannot physically tolerate, in these bodies, everything our sun gives off. It is just too powerful, too potent. That's why we have sunscreen! And our atmosphere is always under discussion by environmentalists, lest we destroy it's protective nature. God lets the good stuff through from the sun, and protects us from that which is too powerful for us, in this life.
BUT, one day, we will get to bask in the fullness of the power generating and emanating from the SON!!! Until then, I'm going to be believing that the power from God's throne is on it's way to those of us who believe. It has no other purpose, or destination!!! It is powerful, and it is fine-tuned for just what we need for every moment!!
Friday, August 7, 2009
Walking Through Hard Times
Recently I wrote a note to a friend whose family was going through a difficult time, and looking for some answers.... I found them hard to come by, and here's my reply:
I am so sorry about the trouble for all of you with these difficulties. I have nothing close to an answer. Some words from Job help me: "When He has tried me, I will come forth as gold". But a lot of folks talk about the end chapter, about how God doubled everything and blessed Job greatly. More donkeys, sheep, more stuff. Twice as much. Yes, I agree, I see that.
And I want to Scream: "Yes! But he buried seven!! Somewhere back in the back, there are seven tombstones!!" All I know is what I learned with the difficult decline of my mother-in-law. Somehow, because of all I'd been through, I realized I'd kind of attached to her, and it was as if I had a "real mom" again. And then she slowly faded... ( I just freaked out several times - really freaked - really wierd emotional freaky, that I didn't understand). Now I know it's called secondary trauma.
Anyway, what I learned, I share again and again with folks supporting loved ones: "You feel like every part of you is being crushed, slowly, and that you are being stuffed through an old timey key hole, and there is so little you can do....but there will be graces along the way."
I tell even my college - & young singles guys, so they'll know: "there are some things in life that will never be fixed, except by a good cry". I can't imagine the amount of eyeliner you must have ruined.....
But I do like to listen to this song, it helps me a lot, sometimes. You may prefer to just minimize the video about Columbine and listen to the song, that's what I do. We will continue to pray.
Love,
Tom B
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uQCLzebZwo&feature=PlayList&p=C396BD50C182BEF6&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=33
I am so sorry about the trouble for all of you with these difficulties. I have nothing close to an answer. Some words from Job help me: "When He has tried me, I will come forth as gold". But a lot of folks talk about the end chapter, about how God doubled everything and blessed Job greatly. More donkeys, sheep, more stuff. Twice as much. Yes, I agree, I see that.
And I want to Scream: "Yes! But he buried seven!! Somewhere back in the back, there are seven tombstones!!" All I know is what I learned with the difficult decline of my mother-in-law. Somehow, because of all I'd been through, I realized I'd kind of attached to her, and it was as if I had a "real mom" again. And then she slowly faded... ( I just freaked out several times - really freaked - really wierd emotional freaky, that I didn't understand). Now I know it's called secondary trauma.
Anyway, what I learned, I share again and again with folks supporting loved ones: "You feel like every part of you is being crushed, slowly, and that you are being stuffed through an old timey key hole, and there is so little you can do....but there will be graces along the way."
I tell even my college - & young singles guys, so they'll know: "there are some things in life that will never be fixed, except by a good cry". I can't imagine the amount of eyeliner you must have ruined.....
But I do like to listen to this song, it helps me a lot, sometimes. You may prefer to just minimize the video about Columbine and listen to the song, that's what I do. We will continue to pray.
Love,
Tom B
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uQCLzebZwo&feature=PlayList&p=C396BD50C182BEF6&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=33
Friday, July 3, 2009
Our Freedom
As you and I celebrate the 4th of July, and freedom of worship, I thought of an email I received from Voice of the Martyrs. (www.persecution.com) Voice of the Martyrs (from our friends dcTalk) monitors world wide assaults on Christians. You need to know how badly some of our brothers and sisters have daily life in other countries.
At the website, you can subscribe to email newsletters, and follow them on twitter. Through twitter on my cell phone, I get several prayer requests per day from them, based on events around the world.
If you ever plan to work for the Lord, this is a great time to do it! Read what Paul said to Timothy in I Timothy 4...."This is why we've thrown ourselves into this venture so totally. We're banking on the living God, Savior of all men and women...Get the word out." (MSG - emphasis mine)
At the website, you can subscribe to email newsletters, and follow them on twitter. Through twitter on my cell phone, I get several prayer requests per day from them, based on events around the world.
If you ever plan to work for the Lord, this is a great time to do it! Read what Paul said to Timothy in I Timothy 4...."This is why we've thrown ourselves into this venture so totally. We're banking on the living God, Savior of all men and women...Get the word out." (MSG - emphasis mine)
Sunday, May 31, 2009
NewlyWed Husband to Nearly Wed Couple
Okay! Here is the Yearly Wed Guy to the Nearly Wed Guy version! (As written by the wife for him). This is the real thing!:
When I read Hubby the stuff I sent you, he thought it was hilarious. I asked him if he had anything to add, and so he gave me his Top Ten. I didn't make these up--these are all Hubby:
"Have patience, because you are not used to her emotional side, but you are used to walking it off or putting dirt on it."
"Never go to bed angry. Don't let it go just to quit an argument. Work through it together"."
"Everybody will say she's always right, but that's wrong, and nobody is perfect."
"When in competition with your wife, it is best to use what I learned while riding my motorcycle--the SEE method of Search-Evaluate-Execute. Search for the problem. Evaluate the problem, seeing what you can and can't do to make it better, and Execute that solution."
"Expect her to do everything. Just kidding... expect each team member to do his or her own part. This is a partnership, in the cleaning, the grocery shopping, and everything."
"Guys... remember the little things, the things that you did that first year you were dating. Remember to give her a kiss when you wake up or a kiss when you walk in the door. You can never say 'I Love You' enough. Get up early in the morning and go get her breakfast, even when you could use that extra hour of sleep. And really, any little thing that you think could be corny or lame, go ahead and do it, because it means the world to her."
"When your wife wants a dog, tell her no. When you want a dog, say no."
"This is for the wives: When your husband has these weird ideas--like riding a horse, getting a kayak, riding a Harley, scuba-diving, or at the greatest extreme, climbing Mount Everest--just know that this is his adventurous side coming out. It's not that he's bored with you, but he's just being 'wild at heart.' Remember that his greatest accomplishment is you."
"Guys, we're always one not to take advice, but it's good to take advice, even from older guys who may have written you poems in high school. It's always good to listen to what they have to say."
"Last, and finally, it's always good to take a moment every day, whether in the morning or at night, to pray for your spouse, because whatever issues you may be going through, she might be going through, too. Even if it's just putting up with you, or work, or anything, always pray for her. There isn't a class about marriage. This is an up front, hands on experience."
OKAY! That was the real thing, from the male perspective after the first year!!
When I read Hubby the stuff I sent you, he thought it was hilarious. I asked him if he had anything to add, and so he gave me his Top Ten. I didn't make these up--these are all Hubby:
"Have patience, because you are not used to her emotional side, but you are used to walking it off or putting dirt on it."
"Never go to bed angry. Don't let it go just to quit an argument. Work through it together"."
"Everybody will say she's always right, but that's wrong, and nobody is perfect."
"When in competition with your wife, it is best to use what I learned while riding my motorcycle--the SEE method of Search-Evaluate-Execute. Search for the problem. Evaluate the problem, seeing what you can and can't do to make it better, and Execute that solution."
"Expect her to do everything. Just kidding... expect each team member to do his or her own part. This is a partnership, in the cleaning, the grocery shopping, and everything."
"Guys... remember the little things, the things that you did that first year you were dating. Remember to give her a kiss when you wake up or a kiss when you walk in the door. You can never say 'I Love You' enough. Get up early in the morning and go get her breakfast, even when you could use that extra hour of sleep. And really, any little thing that you think could be corny or lame, go ahead and do it, because it means the world to her."
"When your wife wants a dog, tell her no. When you want a dog, say no."
"This is for the wives: When your husband has these weird ideas--like riding a horse, getting a kayak, riding a Harley, scuba-diving, or at the greatest extreme, climbing Mount Everest--just know that this is his adventurous side coming out. It's not that he's bored with you, but he's just being 'wild at heart.' Remember that his greatest accomplishment is you."
"Guys, we're always one not to take advice, but it's good to take advice, even from older guys who may have written you poems in high school. It's always good to listen to what they have to say."
"Last, and finally, it's always good to take a moment every day, whether in the morning or at night, to pray for your spouse, because whatever issues you may be going through, she might be going through, too. Even if it's just putting up with you, or work, or anything, always pray for her. There isn't a class about marriage. This is an up front, hands on experience."
OKAY! That was the real thing, from the male perspective after the first year!!
Wife of One Year Shares NewlyWed Advice!
Okay! Since the question comes up that so much material for premarital conversations/coaching comes from men, I asked one of my newlywed wife friends to write me what I should share, to get the lady's perspective on things. My specific question was, "what do you what me to be sure to pass on to the young couples?".
Since this is SO from the heart, I deleted personal references. Here's her response:
LOL!!! Tell them to run now while they still can! Lol... j/k completely...
I think the biggest thing for us has been learning how to communicate as married people and not as dating people. I was telling a friend about this just the other day... before we were married, we had everyday life STUFF (i.e. finances, family stuff, job stuff, school stuff, home stuff, etc.) that we dealt with on an individual basis. You're constantly dealing with those things, but not in conjunction with your boyfriend/girlfriend, fiance, etc. You keep those things separate and talk about them with that person at dinner or on the phone, but for the most part, you're dealing with your stuff and he or she is dealing with his or hers.
Now that we're married, our lives are completely slammed together... my job stuff, his job stuff, OUR home stuff, our finances, etc., and we are not only trying to keep the relationship alive, but we're now dealing with life issues with a person with whom we never had to deal with those things before. It's different from working out issues with a roommate or with a parent, because of the nature of the marriage relationship, but it's important to work through those communication issues through open honesty and humility.
With that being said, for ladies, I think it's important that for those brief moments in time in which we are seeking positive, open communication, we are able to put our emotionality down for a second and trust our guys to make good decisions. For example, when we first started dealing with certain STUFF issues, hubby and I would get into heated discussions and I would get frustrated and scream or fuss or cry, etc. My conflict style is to just leave the room, so a lot of times I would try to squeeze in a last word and leave. hubby's conflict style is to just sulk up and not say anything.
Between those two things, we never got anything accomplished. In those conversations now, it's important for both of us to be honest and for me to take the emotional card out of the deck for a short time and not let my feelings stepped on. It's almost humorous now, because we'll say, "I'm not trying to make you mad, but I just want you to be aware of this..." I think for guys, it's important to realize that we need to communicate often about STUFF and that he needs to be the leader in those conversations in order to make sure that the girl feels secure and steady.
Other things... I think it's important to be forgiving, both for the other person and for yourself. If there's anything that God has taught me in the last year, it's what grace really is. It's living with somebody who sees your every flaw... how you get angry over the little things, how you hate putting dishes from the sink to the dishwasher, how you love to sulk up, etc... but still loves you and wants to make this marriage thing work.
On the flip side, when you understand that side of yourself, you understand the consequences of your actions and how they affect other people, no matter how big or how small, and that makes you want to go to the cross because you now know why Jesus wants to refine you. I think it's important to have grace for that other person because it is undoubtedly a huge transition period, but also grace and forgiveness for yourself because you know God is leading and directing you and polishing you into something better.
This is a very long-winded email, so here are my top ten things I thing newly-married ladies should remember in marriage:
10) You are not your husband's mom, and he may or may not look at you that way. It's important to be very clear about that in a loving way. You are going to be handling some of the same household things that a husband may be used to from a mom, but you need to encourage and discuss how household things are going to be done as a couple.
9) Guy time is just as important as your girl time, and when he hangs out with his friends, it's not because he is getting tired of you. I think hubby is a more content person when he can get out those testosterone spells with his guys, and it gives us a chance to be independent of one another for a while and still bring that individuality into our marriage.
8) If he ignores you, fails to realize what he's done, or does something that you want to throw a plate at him for, it's probably not his fault, but probably just because he is a guy and didn't look at it the way you did. I finally realized that there are a lot of times I will get frustrated with hubby that he has no clue at because I looked at it from a female perspective and he looked at it from a male perspective.
7) Don't get mad at him when he is clueless, but have some of that mercy and grace I was talking about.
6) Understand that he is going to get frustrated with you because you are an emotional creature and that he is learning how to show mercy and grace just like you are.
5) Build a positive relationship with your spouse's family, and show them that you have something to offer. You are a member of that family now, too, and sometimes that can be overwhelming, but don't be afraid to step up to the plate and bring a dessert to Christmas without being asked, etc.
4) Open and honest communication and prayer is the most important factor to making stuff work, but it is also the hardest thing to do. Put your pride down and be real with what you're thinking... your spouse will appreciate it.
3) Do not feel like you are Super Woman and can handle everything all at once, like school, work, home stuff, etc. There's a cross where you're supposed to put those burdens, and it takes time to learn how to manage time, energy, and responsibility like the Proverbs 31 woman. I think that woman must be the Proverbs 31 grandma, because there are days when I feel like I'll never figure that stuff out.
2) Equip your husband to feel adventurous. Give him opportunities to "save the day," to build things, to be a leader, and to know that he's successful. This is how he's made in the image of God, and if he understands how he is created in God's image, then he will more aptly pursue an understanding of how you are created in God's image as a girl.
1) Respect your husband, because that's what the Bible says we're supposed to do and because it's what our husbands need. Even if there are days when he is a complete jerk, he still needs respect because he's the head of the household and that's how God made it. Put the emotions away and still treat him respectfully, and eventually, you can work out whatever issue it is for the greater benefit.
Wow... that's a lot of information, but I hope it is helpful. I can't believe it's almost been a year for us! I tell people that this is my first year teaching and my first year of marriage, and that all I know is that I have more gray hairs than I used to and no idea where they came from :-D. Thanks for asking me for my input... anytime I can help someone out from what I've learned, it's a great thing.
Since this is SO from the heart, I deleted personal references. Here's her response:
LOL!!! Tell them to run now while they still can! Lol... j/k completely...
I think the biggest thing for us has been learning how to communicate as married people and not as dating people. I was telling a friend about this just the other day... before we were married, we had everyday life STUFF (i.e. finances, family stuff, job stuff, school stuff, home stuff, etc.) that we dealt with on an individual basis. You're constantly dealing with those things, but not in conjunction with your boyfriend/girlfriend, fiance, etc. You keep those things separate and talk about them with that person at dinner or on the phone, but for the most part, you're dealing with your stuff and he or she is dealing with his or hers.
Now that we're married, our lives are completely slammed together... my job stuff, his job stuff, OUR home stuff, our finances, etc., and we are not only trying to keep the relationship alive, but we're now dealing with life issues with a person with whom we never had to deal with those things before. It's different from working out issues with a roommate or with a parent, because of the nature of the marriage relationship, but it's important to work through those communication issues through open honesty and humility.
With that being said, for ladies, I think it's important that for those brief moments in time in which we are seeking positive, open communication, we are able to put our emotionality down for a second and trust our guys to make good decisions. For example, when we first started dealing with certain STUFF issues, hubby and I would get into heated discussions and I would get frustrated and scream or fuss or cry, etc. My conflict style is to just leave the room, so a lot of times I would try to squeeze in a last word and leave. hubby's conflict style is to just sulk up and not say anything.
Between those two things, we never got anything accomplished. In those conversations now, it's important for both of us to be honest and for me to take the emotional card out of the deck for a short time and not let my feelings stepped on. It's almost humorous now, because we'll say, "I'm not trying to make you mad, but I just want you to be aware of this..." I think for guys, it's important to realize that we need to communicate often about STUFF and that he needs to be the leader in those conversations in order to make sure that the girl feels secure and steady.
Other things... I think it's important to be forgiving, both for the other person and for yourself. If there's anything that God has taught me in the last year, it's what grace really is. It's living with somebody who sees your every flaw... how you get angry over the little things, how you hate putting dishes from the sink to the dishwasher, how you love to sulk up, etc... but still loves you and wants to make this marriage thing work.
On the flip side, when you understand that side of yourself, you understand the consequences of your actions and how they affect other people, no matter how big or how small, and that makes you want to go to the cross because you now know why Jesus wants to refine you. I think it's important to have grace for that other person because it is undoubtedly a huge transition period, but also grace and forgiveness for yourself because you know God is leading and directing you and polishing you into something better.
This is a very long-winded email, so here are my top ten things I thing newly-married ladies should remember in marriage:
10) You are not your husband's mom, and he may or may not look at you that way. It's important to be very clear about that in a loving way. You are going to be handling some of the same household things that a husband may be used to from a mom, but you need to encourage and discuss how household things are going to be done as a couple.
9) Guy time is just as important as your girl time, and when he hangs out with his friends, it's not because he is getting tired of you. I think hubby is a more content person when he can get out those testosterone spells with his guys, and it gives us a chance to be independent of one another for a while and still bring that individuality into our marriage.
8) If he ignores you, fails to realize what he's done, or does something that you want to throw a plate at him for, it's probably not his fault, but probably just because he is a guy and didn't look at it the way you did. I finally realized that there are a lot of times I will get frustrated with hubby that he has no clue at because I looked at it from a female perspective and he looked at it from a male perspective.
7) Don't get mad at him when he is clueless, but have some of that mercy and grace I was talking about.
6) Understand that he is going to get frustrated with you because you are an emotional creature and that he is learning how to show mercy and grace just like you are.
5) Build a positive relationship with your spouse's family, and show them that you have something to offer. You are a member of that family now, too, and sometimes that can be overwhelming, but don't be afraid to step up to the plate and bring a dessert to Christmas without being asked, etc.
4) Open and honest communication and prayer is the most important factor to making stuff work, but it is also the hardest thing to do. Put your pride down and be real with what you're thinking... your spouse will appreciate it.
3) Do not feel like you are Super Woman and can handle everything all at once, like school, work, home stuff, etc. There's a cross where you're supposed to put those burdens, and it takes time to learn how to manage time, energy, and responsibility like the Proverbs 31 woman. I think that woman must be the Proverbs 31 grandma, because there are days when I feel like I'll never figure that stuff out.
2) Equip your husband to feel adventurous. Give him opportunities to "save the day," to build things, to be a leader, and to know that he's successful. This is how he's made in the image of God, and if he understands how he is created in God's image, then he will more aptly pursue an understanding of how you are created in God's image as a girl.
1) Respect your husband, because that's what the Bible says we're supposed to do and because it's what our husbands need. Even if there are days when he is a complete jerk, he still needs respect because he's the head of the household and that's how God made it. Put the emotions away and still treat him respectfully, and eventually, you can work out whatever issue it is for the greater benefit.
Wow... that's a lot of information, but I hope it is helpful. I can't believe it's almost been a year for us! I tell people that this is my first year teaching and my first year of marriage, and that all I know is that I have more gray hairs than I used to and no idea where they came from :-D. Thanks for asking me for my input... anytime I can help someone out from what I've learned, it's a great thing.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
What Is A Life Purpose Coach?
This is an email answer I gave to a young friend who asked: What is a Certified Life Purpose Coach?
The Life Purpose Coaching is a more specific type of coaching, aimed at helping you discover your unique design, and how God has directed you and equipped you so far. Of interest is what you enjoy doing and being the most. The point is to help YOU find the directions you should be going, to fufill your purpose. Often I work with a client through a book, one chapter per week that we both read, that helps dig into one's heart and mind. There are numerous possibilities: The Power of a Loving Man, S.H.A.P.E, Character Makeover, Telling Yourself the Truth, a John Eldredge book, or The Purpose Driven Life. Some of these things will beat us up in showing us our weaknesses!
Using the SHAPE concept, we could focus on 5 things: S - Spiritual Gift: (if you don't know yours yet, we have an inventory to help with that;) H - Heart: What's in your heart, what excites you, what would you do for free? A - Abilities: What skills or talents with people, computers, machinery, etc. do you have? P - Personality: Again, several tools are available here, like the DISC, to help you see how you work best with projects & people. E - Experiences: Where have you been, what have you done that contributes to who you are, and what you can do? How is God bringing all this together???
For a motivated man, I'd suggest we'd work through the S.H.A.P.E. book. If you're kind of "stuck" emotionally, kind of in a rut, we might use Telling Yourself The Truth. The format is a 10-week relationship, or based on the book chapters. It's generally a 50 minute telephone or face-to-face session. I'd rather work with a person who wants to change and grow, and trust the Lord for the results. He orders the book from Amazon, or wherever, and we'd go to work. We could meet somewhere convenient, or work by telephone, with email updates.
Sometimes I just listen to a guy: maybe where he's hurting, struggling... I've had several phone clients passed on from doctors, and I just kind of listen, ask a few questions, poke around, let him find his own strengths in the Lord.
A fellow looking at Holy Matrimony might be more interested in something on those lines... but being pounded with the material in S.H.A.P.E or Character Makeover would be fine preparation!
I've learned my spiritual gift is exhortation (encouragement), and part of my heart is the "least of these"... (and all of us feel like the least of these, sometimes!!) That shows up in my doing parenting classes for the Women's Resource Center, (for DFCS and Court Ordered adults who are trying to get their children back, or at least visitation rights).... that's feeling pretty "least". Another great part of my heart is my "younger brothers" (and I do work with the college & young singles in Sunday School, having spent some years with youth in general, and middle schoolers in particular).
SEE, knowing these things about myself, helps me know the areas/offers I'd thrive in, and also the areas that really wear me down. Then I can listen to my heart, and know which opportunities to say yes to (like working with a client, doing Middle School VBS) and the things to say no to (like being an active deacon again, after years of that, or working at a maintenance type job).
I am glad to work with an individual in any way that works for them. One thing we guys need is strong bonds and support systems... and I have friends in every decade of life that I know would "come back for me" like the Marines do, if they knew I was in trouble. Developing those type relationships doesn't come fast or cheaply, but is key to seeing the growth and maturity each of us is looking to build!
The Life Purpose Coaching is a more specific type of coaching, aimed at helping you discover your unique design, and how God has directed you and equipped you so far. Of interest is what you enjoy doing and being the most. The point is to help YOU find the directions you should be going, to fufill your purpose. Often I work with a client through a book, one chapter per week that we both read, that helps dig into one's heart and mind. There are numerous possibilities: The Power of a Loving Man, S.H.A.P.E, Character Makeover, Telling Yourself the Truth, a John Eldredge book, or The Purpose Driven Life. Some of these things will beat us up in showing us our weaknesses!
Using the SHAPE concept, we could focus on 5 things: S - Spiritual Gift: (if you don't know yours yet, we have an inventory to help with that;) H - Heart: What's in your heart, what excites you, what would you do for free? A - Abilities: What skills or talents with people, computers, machinery, etc. do you have? P - Personality: Again, several tools are available here, like the DISC, to help you see how you work best with projects & people. E - Experiences: Where have you been, what have you done that contributes to who you are, and what you can do? How is God bringing all this together???
For a motivated man, I'd suggest we'd work through the S.H.A.P.E. book. If you're kind of "stuck" emotionally, kind of in a rut, we might use Telling Yourself The Truth. The format is a 10-week relationship, or based on the book chapters. It's generally a 50 minute telephone or face-to-face session. I'd rather work with a person who wants to change and grow, and trust the Lord for the results. He orders the book from Amazon, or wherever, and we'd go to work. We could meet somewhere convenient, or work by telephone, with email updates.
Sometimes I just listen to a guy: maybe where he's hurting, struggling... I've had several phone clients passed on from doctors, and I just kind of listen, ask a few questions, poke around, let him find his own strengths in the Lord.
A fellow looking at Holy Matrimony might be more interested in something on those lines... but being pounded with the material in S.H.A.P.E or Character Makeover would be fine preparation!
I've learned my spiritual gift is exhortation (encouragement), and part of my heart is the "least of these"... (and all of us feel like the least of these, sometimes!!) That shows up in my doing parenting classes for the Women's Resource Center, (for DFCS and Court Ordered adults who are trying to get their children back, or at least visitation rights).... that's feeling pretty "least". Another great part of my heart is my "younger brothers" (and I do work with the college & young singles in Sunday School, having spent some years with youth in general, and middle schoolers in particular).
SEE, knowing these things about myself, helps me know the areas/offers I'd thrive in, and also the areas that really wear me down. Then I can listen to my heart, and know which opportunities to say yes to (like working with a client, doing Middle School VBS) and the things to say no to (like being an active deacon again, after years of that, or working at a maintenance type job).
I am glad to work with an individual in any way that works for them. One thing we guys need is strong bonds and support systems... and I have friends in every decade of life that I know would "come back for me" like the Marines do, if they knew I was in trouble. Developing those type relationships doesn't come fast or cheaply, but is key to seeing the growth and maturity each of us is looking to build!
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